It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize