So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Randomize
