Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Come on in and take your pants off
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