i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
