return my video game
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
