i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
There r osticjed everywhere
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize