Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
