Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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