As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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