Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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