That's intense
too bad you live with your parents still
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
