I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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