Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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