so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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