What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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