So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
