Her vagina should come with caution tape.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
