I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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