omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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