when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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