Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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