so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I am mentally ready for anal.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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