I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Randomize
