he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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