yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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