He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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