I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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