I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
a search helicopter?!
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
