We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
