great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
