Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
