theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
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