No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I accidentally burped into my bong.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
my liver is dry heaving
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
