WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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