Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
