And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
