I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
