I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
