So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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