belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
