Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize