? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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