This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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