Someone shit on the floor
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
