It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Randomize
