I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize