yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
