Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
