omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Boobs speak an international language.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize