My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
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