he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
