Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
you guys were way drunker than both of me
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
